Only Connect

Be a mentor to someone. Everyone needs help to achieve their dreams and goals in life.

Mentorship is an excellent way of providing needed help, encouragement, and guidance. Look

for opportunities to mentor people at virtuefirst.org/virtues/service.

Do What You Say You’re Gonna Do

Remember my friend Nancy Fish I mentioned a few pages back? This is the guiding principle of her life and it inspires me: really commit. Saying you’ll do something and actually doing it are two very different things. Commit to something you’ve been meaning to do and take the first step today. If you don’t Nancy may track you down and hold on to it!

Your Goals Will Grow You

Make a list of short-term goals you would like to achieve by the end of the year, month, or even week. As you accomplish your goals, give gratitude for the effort, inspiration, people, and other factors that helped you along the way. My goal is to see how I can give more to those around me, near and far. I would love to hear your inspirations!

Look at Everything in a New Way

Simply reframe your perception: each of us has had dreams that for one reason or another, we do not achieve. And we may have made choices that perhaps were not the best. Yet, rather than allowing regret to overtake us, we must celebrate all the other goals we’ve accomplished and positive choices we’ve made.

Human nature so often leads us to perceive the one negative in a sea of positives. But we can retrain ourselves to learn the lessons embedded in our mistakes, and allow ourselves to feel pride in the beauty we are capable of. All it takes is a little shift. You’ll see.

Do What You Say You’re Gonna Do

Remember my friend Nancy Fish I mentioned a few pages back? This is the guiding principle of her life and it inspires me: really commit. Saying you’ll do something and actually doing it are two very different things. Commit to something you’ve been meaning to do and take the first step today. If you don’t Nancy may track you down and hold on to it!

Your Goals Will Grow You

    Make a list of short-term goals you would like to achieve by the end of the year, month, or even week. As you accomplish your goals, give gratitude for the effort, inspiration, people, and other factors that helped you along the way. My goal is to see how I can give more to those around me, near and far. I would love to hear your inspirations!

To Be of Service

    “To Be of Use,” Marge Piercy’s marvelous poem, suggests something of the human condition-that we all long to be useful, to help, to work together toward a common goal. This is surely the best part of the human spirit. Meditate upon this: 

    What is my true purpose? What am I here to do in this life? 

    I recommend that you contemplate this question deeply and for a very long time-days, weeks, months, and years, even. Let the answer speak through your service to others.

World No-Tobacco Day

    Smoking is a drag, literally. It is bad for your health and the environment. If you need a little push to help you quit or to encourage a loved one to stop smoking, the American Lung Association website at lung.org is replete with helpful information. They report that smoking-related diseases in the United States claim an estimated 443,000 lives each year. In addition, cigarette smoke contains over 4,800 chemicals, 69 of which are known to cause cancer. Leave this old habit behind and we’ll all breathe easier!

Yes, You Can

    Remove the word can’t from your vocabulary and think about what is actually holding you back-fear, reluctance, pride? Once you stop talking yourself out of taking a risk or making a difficult decision, life will open up for you and so will your mind. Do something nice and helpful without being asked. Take out the trash, clean the house, and visit a relative. Once you make a habit of these tasks, you won’t need reminding since you will want to do them as you go about your usual day.

Let’s Make it a Complaint-Free World

    Go one day without complaining. Even better, go a week. If this is hard for you to accomplish, it’s time to make some changes in your life. Think positively, live in the present, and appreciate where you are and who you are. Today is a gift, so accept and embrace it. 

    Author Mark Bowen wrote a fantastic book on this very topic that I turn to when I need a reminder, as we all do now and again. My copy came with a bracelet, a simple way to monitor how often you complain that helps you track your progress toward becoming “complaint-free”. Put on the bracelet and every time you complain, switch it to the other wrist. The goal is to go 21 consecutive days without switching the bracelet. It is harder than you might think and I was a bit shocked at what a complainer I turned out to be. It was a really good exercise for me- I highly recommend it. I benefited enormously and I suspect those around me did, too!

Do the Thing You think You Cannot Do

    My friend Clare Cooley practices this courageous philosophy and now teaches others how to “Imagine a Day.” Clare is probably the ultimate autodidact; she had to drop out of school pretty early to take care of family members. This has not stopped her from learning and doing anything she sets her mind to, from design, filmmaking, and painting to crafting, writing, and music. One of Clare’s most spectacular gifts is her show-stopping skate dancing and there are many YouTube videos that strangers have taped and uploaded of her whirling and twirling. Clare, who chose to not allow economic difficulties and a lack of formal education prevent her from succeeding in life, has gone on to show her ceramics and naturalist paintings in museums and galleries around the country. She says, “Lack of imagination is the only limitation and fear creates self-doubt.” In her teaching, she helps people get out of “fear mode” and unlock the power of imagination. You can see her beautiful artwork at clarecooley.com.

    I urge you to Imagine a Day- pick something you always wanted to do, but were afraid to try. Painting, French cookery, playing piano, singing, learning a foreign language, yoga, rock-climbing, ballroom dancing, pottery, snorkeling-something that speaks to you on a profound level but scares you just a little. Find a class or barter with someone who is an expert to whom you can teach something, and dive right in.

List Your Life

Instead of writing up and crossing things off of a bucket list, create a “life list.” Let your hopes, dreams, fears, and thoughts spill out of you and into this list. Next to each entry, write down how that emotion or fear makes you feel- does it hold you back or empower you? This task will put you on the road to self-discovery. Knowing who you are is important in order to have relationships with others. Know thyself.

Unplug (and Recharge!)

    Forego using technological devices today. Texting your friend, watching your favorite show, checking your email- all can wait until tomorrow! Turn off your devices and turn on your senses! Read a book, cook a meal, and enjoy the outdoors by taking a walk or tending to your garden. Technology distracts us from the real world, occupying our attention with game applications, chat rooms, social media websites, commercials, and so on. Want to know what’s going on in the news? Read a newspaper. Be aware of the here and now by finding activities that don’t require electricity or a battery. Make your own entertainment!

Only Connect

    Be a mentor to someone. Everyone needs help to achieve their dreams and goals in life. Mentorship is an excellent way of providing needed help, encouragement, and guidance. Look for opportunities to mentor people at virtuefirst.org/virtues/service.

Resolve to Be a Force for Good in This World

    Did you make a New Year’s resolution for this year? Throw that word resolution out the window, It’s not strong enough to hold people to their goals—or at least that is true for me and everyone I know! If you want to eat healthier, spend more time with your family, or finally volunteer at your church’s soup kitchen, go ahead and make these things happen. Tell people about your mission and maybe they will join forces with you. I had so much fun at Glide Memorial Church serving lunch that my friends asked to come along with me! Or, if you want to jump-start your New Year’s with a major act of kindness, head on down to LA for the New Year’s Race for A Place Called Home (apch.org). They are a safe haven in South Central Los Angeles where underserved youth are empowered to take ownership of the quality and direction of their lives through programs in education, arts, and well-being. These young people are inspired to make a meaningful difference in their community and world. 

Look at Everything in a New Way

    Simply reframe your perception: each of us has had dreams that for one reason or another, we do not achieve. And we may have made choices that perhaps were not the best. Yet, rather than allowing regret to overtake us, we must celebrate all the other goals we’ve accomplished and positive choices we’ve made. 

    Human nature so often leads us to perceive the one negative in a sea of positives. But we can retrain ourselves to learn the lessons embedded in our mistakes, and allow ourselves to feel pride in the beauty we are capable of. All it takes is a little shift. You’ll see.

Celebrate World Teachers Day

    Teaching others is hard work and can be a thankless job. Whether you are a student or have kids in school, approach a teacher and tell them what a great job they are doing. AdoptAClassroom.org goes to the head of the class in my book for the good work they do: it gives teachers a hand by providing needed classroom materials so that students can succeed.

    It is estimated that more than 15 million children don’t have the resources they need to do well in school. Teachers spend more than $1 billion a year stocking their own classrooms due to a lack of funding in schools. Supporting K-12th grade students in public, private, and charter schools, AdoptAClassroom.org makes it easy for donors to provide funding to classrooms throughout America. Teachers register their classrooms and needs online; donors discover classrooms through simple search tools, and make targeted contributions. Their goal is to connect donors with every classroom in the country. A-plus!

Teach at Citizen School

    Teach yoga, gardening, and more to middle schoolers. Reducing dropout rates by getting kids excited about learning is a major goal of Citizen Schools (citizenschools.org). Subjects covered in the 90-minute, 10-week after-school, volunteer-taught classes have included journalism, yoga, and architecture, with a focus on being “very interactive,” says Stacey Gilbert, Director of Media Relations. “Volunteers are encouraged to teach what they’re passionate about.”

Your Goals Will Grow You

    Make a list of short-term goals you would like to achieve by the end of the year, month, or even week. As you accomplish your goals, give gratitude for the effort, inspiration, people, and other factors that helped you along the way. My goal is to see how I can give more to those around me, near and far. I would love to hear your inspirations!

Mindfulness at Mealtime

    Eat like a Beatle! Sir Paul McCartney and many other celebrities support Meat Free Mondays. Check it out at meatlessmonday.com. The Belgian city of Ghent has instituted a Meat Free Thursday. Choose a day of the week to eat vegetarian or vegan and try to stick to this one-day diet each week. This global movement is saving water and preventing deforestation, not to mention its enormous health benefits!