Do the Thing You think You Cannot Do

    My friend Clare Cooley practices this courageous philosophy and now teaches others how to “Imagine a Day.” Clare is probably the ultimate autodidact; she had to drop out of school pretty early to take care of family members. This has not stopped her from learning and doing anything she sets her mind to, from design, filmmaking, and painting to crafting, writing, and music. One of Clare’s most spectacular gifts is her show-stopping skate dancing and there are many YouTube videos that strangers have taped and uploaded of her whirling and twirling. Clare, who chose to not allow economic difficulties and a lack of formal education prevent her from succeeding in life, has gone on to show her ceramics and naturalist paintings in museums and galleries around the country. She says, “Lack of imagination is the only limitation and fear creates self-doubt.” In her teaching, she helps people get out of “fear mode” and unlock the power of imagination. You can see her beautiful artwork at clarecooley.com.

    I urge you to Imagine a Day- pick something you always wanted to do, but were afraid to try. Painting, French cookery, playing piano, singing, learning a foreign language, yoga, rock-climbing, ballroom dancing, pottery, snorkeling-something that speaks to you on a profound level but scares you just a little. Find a class or barter with someone who is an expert to whom you can teach something, and dive right in.

Share Your Skills

    Teach someone a craft or skill you are good at. Sharing your talent with someone else may allow them to discover their own potential. Whether it’s cooking, archery, or photography, spend some time doing what you love with another. Teaching people how to do something new will help you maintain your interest and establish a connection with the person you are with. No doubt you will learn just as much from being a teacher.

Knitting the World Back Together with a Lot of Love

    Volunteer was never a word in her vocabulary. Not that Lee Grant didn’t know what it meant, but it wasn’t something she would ever think about doing. Feeling unloved as a child left her self-centred, angry, and needy. As far as Lee was concerned, the world owed her. But it was hard to get to know the world, as small as hers was. Sheltered and sequestered in a small coastal community in rural New England, she knew little about the daily lives of regular people with regular families, but enough to know that hers wasn’t like theirs. “Bad things happened in my house,” she said, “and I never understood why, because I was afraid to ask.” 

    Throughout her teen and young adult years, Lee used drugs and alcohol to transport herself, begging attention from anyone and everyone. Chemicals seemed to work in the short haul, but eventually they led to more destructive behaviors: setting fires, shoplifting, drunk driving, punching through plate glass windows. Cutting helped drain her pent up self-loathing and relieved her. Sutures and butterfly bandages briefly put her back together, but after so many years and so many scars, self-mutilation wasn’t working. After three weeks in an institution for attempted suicide, she was ready to try something different. 

    One day, out of the blue, Lee was invited into a knit shop filled with happy, loving people and found a passion and joy she never knew before. “I made things with my hands and felt good about myself. I entered an afghan in the county fair and won a blue ribbon. I joined AA and stopped drinking. I found a community of creative people who accepted me and my knitting and that, along with sober living, brought the attention I craved. But still...something was missing,”she said. She noticed she felt best when she shared her knowledge of knitting and making other people happy brought a new kind of satisfaction.

    On a whim, Lee volunteered to teach knitting classes to kids for the local Santa Rosa chapter of Catholic Charities (CatholicCharities.org). She wanted to find out if knitting would make a difference to them like it did for her. She wanted to give them something they could turn to when life got too scary, or complicated, or boring...something they could turn to for comfort or fun. She gave them sticks and string and direction. She gave them an opportunity to feel accomplished and proud. She gave them a piece of herself and found out what she’d been missing. 

    Lee began to care about other people. “I taught families at a homeless shelter to knit. I taught a group of foster teens. I crocheted for battered women and premature babies. I knitted warm hats for cold-headed cancer patients I would never get to know. 

    “All of this giving changes me. I feel good inside. No longer hollow and self-centered, I feel something akin to love. For others. For myself. For who I am. For what I do.” Lee is not just any knitter; she is tremendously gifted and tremendously generous. She is the author of several books, including Love in Every Stitch, and is a sought-after pattern designer. Go to her Facebook page, “Knitting and Healing With Lee Grant,” or you can find her at a shelter with a lot of bright, beautiful skeins of yarn and a bunch of happy kids, doing what she does best. 

    I asked Lee to sum up how it was that she came to “be a good in the world.” 

    “I blame it on volunteering,” she said.

Teach at Citizen School

    Teach yoga, gardening, and more to middle schoolers. Reducing dropout rates by getting kids excited about learning is a major goal of Citizen Schools (citizenschools.org). Subjects covered in the 90-minute, 10-week after-school, volunteer-taught classes have included journalism, yoga, and architecture, with a focus on being “very interactive,” says Stacey Gilbert, Director of Media Relations. “Volunteers are encouraged to teach what they’re passionate about.”

Keep Your Garden Green

• Plant some bamboo. Bamboo contributes to the balancing of oxygen and carbon dioxide in the atmosphere.
• Don’t use a leaf blower. The horrible noise is reason enough to avoid these machines. Compost instead, and never burn leaves!
• Plant a garden using xeriscaping-no water needed. Find out more at ecolife.com/garden/natural-lawn/xeriscaping.html.
• Capture rainwater for gardens.
• Fertilize with grass clippings.
• When watering your garden, turn on the water early in the morning to minimize evaporation.
• Try not to fertilize before a storm to avoid the fertilizer being washed away.

Turn Off Your TV and Your Brain Back On

    Nowadays, children have computers and chat rooms, mobile phones, and a TV in their room with hundreds of channels in glorious color. Children can be techno-wizards- but TV is a time filler and time killer. It both encourages and normalizes violence, in both behavior and attitude. TV makes children lazy, and sluggish in thought and action. 

    If you feel your children are watching too much television and it’s having a negative impact:

• Have all cable disconnected.
• Remove all TV’s except one from the house.
• Limit TV viewing to set hours, such as only after homework is finished; and no TV during meals and no morning TV.
• Limit channels watched
• Have family evenings that are fun. Encourage new hobbies.
• Don’t rely on the TV for entertainment. Make your own. Talk to your family, and have them talk to you.
  

Be a Kid For a Day

    Remember the good ol’ days when you had more art projects than responsibilities? You can still embrace your inner child by spending the day with a young relative or your own child while playing games, making crafts, and encouraging activity.  You may reawaken talents and interests you had long since forgotten and introduce your child to new ones along the way. Paint a picture together, read storybooks aloud, play dress up and talk with them. This will create a stronger bond between you two that will last a lifetime and make for great memories. Time is the most precious resource and spending it with a young person will have lasting, positive results on their life.