Stories Are Not Just for Bedtime

    Read a child a story. Introducing children to the world of books while they’re young will help boost their imagination and intelligence (and will also strengthen your bond). Whether you are babysitting, reading to your own child, or volunteering at a library or hospital, this deed goes a long way.

Pass on the Wisdom of Grandmothers to Children Today

    Rich, my beloved, was raised by his grandmother, whom he called “GM.” She had been the wife of the head of their village and clan in Southern China until the Japanese Occupation, when war devastated the community at the cost of many lives. She felt very fook sing (lucky) to have made it to America with her only son and they rebuilt their lives from scratch. She ran a Chinese laundry which I have no doubt was the finest in all of Flushing, Queens. While working and taking care of her grandchildren, she told stories of the homeland, including the hardest times of having to eat insects during drought and war, famine, and pestilence. She relayed all this with no bitterness, only a sense of great good fortune in getting to live in the land of plenty in the US. Day by day, story-by-story, she instilled values of excellence-gratitude, hard work, keeping a positive attitude no matter what-in her children and grandchildren. 

    When Rich and his younger brother Jimmy went to public school in Queens, they made lots of friends in that melting pot metropolis, including a young African American boy who was really tall for his age and came from a family that had a hard time putting enough food on the table. One day, he stopped by her house with Rich and Jimmy. It took GM about two seconds to assess the situation and she told them to bring him by every day. She always made extra for their new fast-growing buddy. Having faced severe hunger during the war, GM was not going to let anybody in her circle go hungry. 

    Every day, in ways large or small, she showed her family how to do the right thing- stand on the bus so others can sit, be polite even if others are rude and, above all, “Take care of your clan.”

National Solo Vacation Day

    Go on vacation by yourself. Pick a town, state, or country that you have always wanted to go to and go there, alone! Think about it: you can make your own schedule, wake up when you want, stay out, stay in, and eat what you feel like. This is your chance at making a memory that will last you a lifetime and add to the story of your life.

Helping Those Who Want to Help Themselves

    We all remember the Biblical parable about teaching a man to fish so he can provide for himself and his family. Two thousand years later, we can do exactly this. My dad taught me how to fish in a pond back home on the farm in West Virginia. Even as a seven-year-old, I noticed that we not only got a couple of day’s worth of yummy trout for our efforts but my papa, a former Marine with many battle scars, seemed to relax after an afternoon at the pond. You can gift a $49 fishing kit in a loved one’s name or set up a recurring monthly donation at Action Against Hunger ( ActionAgainstHunger.org), which feeds over 7 million people each year. Go fish!

We All Have a Story

    My dad loved to tell stories of being in World War II and he did have many dramatic tales of saving lives. He even delivered a Japanese POW’s letter to his parents in Tokyo, a a major act of kindness that involved a great deal of risk. I really wish I had recorded them, but I still carry dad’s stories and share them in his honor. Our elders, in particular, have much to share and life lessons we could all learn from. The Library of Congress is gathering these by sending out volunteers to video record in the Veteran’s History Project (loc.gov.vets). To me, one of the most special aspects of this oral history project is that it not only includes the Greatest Generation, but also features young people coming back from Iraq and Afghanistan, whose stories are equally precious. I think we are learning that every generation has true greatness.

Start Chatting It Up

    My boyfriend has that magic ability to talk to anyone; 99% of the time, he makes a new friend, too. It is fun to watch him in action and he is definitely somebody you want to bring to parties and social occasions. 

    Be open to conversing with new people and becoming friendly with them. If you’re at a bookstore and see someone holding a book you like, strike up a conversation and ask them about it. You may make a new acquaintance or find out that they’re in the same business as you. You can network yourself, share ideas, and make connections at any time. 

    In line at the Pacific Cafe on Geary Street in San Francisco, we met a woman whose cousin from mainland China was being held in immigration detention for not having the proper paperwork. My boyfriend, who is fluent in Cantonese, was able to offer vital information to this family. You never know when you might need the help of a total stranger!

Breast Cancer Awareness Month

    As we enter October, national Breast Cancer Awareness Month, be sure to schedule an appointment with your doctor to have an exam. Men need to remind their doctors, as well, as this is not just a women’s issue. Remind your close friends to do the same and schedule appointments for the same time so you can go together and give moral support. It is important for us to be educated about all forms of cancer and to take the necessary steps to stay healthy. Visit breastcancer.org to answer and questions you may have. 

    I am a breast cancer survivor and deeply grateful. I remember getting the diagnosis and just going completely numb. I was like a zombie going through the motions of my life, getting up and going to work, cooking dinner, trying to focus but all I could think was “I have cancer.” My friends and family helped me through it all. I also had a genius doctor who got me and understood that it would be a physical, emotional and spiritual journey. She was open to discussions about all that. I am lucky in so many ways, being free and clear for over a decade now. I bonded with my female physician, who asked me to stay involved in her practice as a counselor for the newly diagnosed. Each time I work with someone who has just found out they have cancer, I offer my story and all the success stories I have witnessed, while listening to their fears, dishing out lots of hugs, and helping them in any way I can. This is one of the best things I do with my life-using my wisdom to help another.